Sunday, September 5, 2010

Six Months

Today is a hard day.  It has been six months since I lost my 18 year old baby.  Those emotional waves that come and go aren't happening as often, yet Porter is always in the back of my mind and forever in my heart.  I can be doing something as simple as driving down State Street and I will start crying.  I was weeding and cleaning the yard yesterday and a small memory triggered something and I started crying.  I don't mind crying, in fact it is very cleansing for me.  It's just embarrassing when it happens in public. My eldest son walked into the room last night and said "It still doesn't seem real."  I knew exactly what he was talking about and I completely agreed with him.  Each day I wake up and hope it's a bad dream, yet reality hits and I know it isn't.

In just 8 days, September 13th, it will be Porter's 19th birthday.  We are having a big celebration for him.  We are breaking it down into two different days.  On Saturday the 11th we are eating breakfast burritos (Porter's all-time favorite food) at the Dry Canyon parking lot in Lindon and then hiking Porter's mountain and placing this memorial rock at the base of the cliff.  A good friend of our family owns a business called rememberrocks.com and created this beautiful rock for us to place in the mountains. (Thanks so much Neal and Arlene)  Our family sat around the kitchen table one night trying to figure out what to put on the rock and this is what we all agreed on.  Porter's very favorite group was Keane and his favorite song was "Somewhere Only We Know."  This title also has reference to those of us that know exactly where he fell, and that's where this memorial will be placed. 

The second part of Porter's birthday celebration will be on Monday the 13th and will be held in our back yard.  Porter's life long dream was to be in a band and to be famous one day.  He worked so hard at his music, his writing, his audio mixing and eventually tried out to be in a band and was accepted. The name of the band is "Ask for the Future".  They are so graciously coming to perform a concert in Porter's honor.  We are so excited about this event and are looking forward to a nice evening of music, friends, family, and neighbors, whom we appreciate and love so much.  Oh! and eating cake too because it's a birthday party.

I love you Porter♥        

14 comments:

Beth at Aunties said...

Tender hugs and I am and will be thinking about you and your family on this the other two memorable dates.
I can't help but think he got a head start on his mission.
The rock is an awesome gift.

Lara said...

I think that the rock and the birthday celebration are wonderful ideas.

Hugs, Susette. I think of you often, and you have been such an amazing example of grace and faith in the face of tragedy.

Dixie Mom said...

Sounds like it will be a perfect birthday for your boy. I think about you often hope that you are feeling comfort. You are so strong and a great example. Keep your faith.

Doran & Jody said...

Sounds like a GREAT time!
Sure wish we could be there.
Love your guts!

The Kooky Queen--Rachel said...

Oh dear Susette! I hope to never feel what you are feeling but I love how you remember and celebrate his beautiful life. What a neat tribute to him!

Cynthia said...

I love it! And thank you for sharing 'remember rocks'. I need to get one for my Aunt. As you know, she lost one of her 16 year old twins to a hiking accident 12 years ago. They have a hike in his honor every year but being able to place one of these rocks on the mesa would be so special for them. Thank you! Have a wonderful event filled with joyful music and happy rememberances.

Heatherlyn said...

The concert should be great!

One thing I love about the gospel is the perspective and comfort it brings. I believe that Porter is pursuing music right now in heaven, with a lot fewer limits than are here on earth. I bet when you see him again you will be able to hear his wonderful compositions that he is working on now.

Stacia said...

Hi Susette -
Joseph and I went to a Keane concert in Dallas for our anniversary this year. I love the memorial stone and now that song will always make me think of Porter.

*LyndiLou* said...

What a beautiful way to honor and celebrate Porter! We sure love you guys!

Launi said...

The rock is beautiful, Susette. We will be there Monday--we'll bring ice cream.
Love you...

LL said...

Sounds like a perfect way to celebrate an amazing life.
I look forward to hearing all about it and seeing photos.

rachel said...

Happy Birthday, to beloved Porter! The rock is absolutely amazing. I love Keane and that song is one of my favorites.

I can't wait to hear about the concert. What a wonderful tribute.

Cherie said...

I love both celebrations that you have planned to remember Porter and celebrate his birthday.
The rock is just sooooo neat!
The concert and party tonight sound amazing.
I am sure Porter will be there enjoying it with you all.
God Bless you tonight!

Jillian said...

What a perfect phrase from a good song for him. Birthday wishes to Porter and hugs to you guys!